Ten of the following quotes are verbatim public statements made during the term of Vice President Kamala Harris. I wrote the other ten. Try to guess which ten of these are actually Harris quotes and which ten are Bittinger facsimiles.
No cheating, now. Don’t internet-search the quotes individually or through shortcuts like “political gibberish” and “gibberish imitation.” Get in the mood by reciting “You can’t make this stuff up.” (You can’t, but I can.)
Now that lingering-president Obama and a couple other democracy-loving kingmakers have cancelled executive branch dementia in favor of executive branch baby talk, here’s an August, 2024 update from the author of the fake Harris quotes (me):
State-run TV is replacing The Mr. Magoo Show with The Mary Tyler Moron Show.
The correct sources of these 20 quotes are identified at the end.
#1 — “We must together work together to see where we are, where we are headed, where we are going and our vision for where we should be. But also see it as a moment, yes, to together address the challenges and to work on the opportunities that are presented by this moment.”
#2 — “When we talk about our children — I know for this group, we all believe that when we talk about the children of the community, they are a children of the community,”
#3 — “When I was a little girl, my mother told me that if people hate you, don’t always hate them back. Find what love within them you can find, and hate only the hatred that you can not ignore. But ignore it anyway.”
#4 — “Why are electric school buses important? Just think of the precious cargo they are carrying and the carbon footprint they are not making, something those children can be proud of even when they have passed on but then their children can be proud of. So yellow and nice and plugged-in.”
#5 — “We’ve got to take this stuff seriously, as seriously as you are because you have been forced to have taken this seriously.”
#6 — “World cooperation depends on the nations of the world recognizing that cooperation is not only necessary but must be cooperative, benefitting from the cooperation of nations whose interests may not be identical but are always respectful, or should be.”
#7 — “I will not dispute a proposition I don’t even believe in. Your belief is up to you. But my belief does not depend on believing that what you believe I believe.”
#8 — “We will work together and continue to work together to address these issues, to tackle these challenges, and to work together as we continue to work, operating from the new norms, rules, and agreements, that we will convene to work together on to galvanize global action…and I know we will work on this together.”
#9 — “My service to my country has always been an honor to serve, even when it is not acknowledged, especially when it is not acknowledged.”
#10 — “It is time for us to do what we have been doing. And that time is every day.”
#11 — “And the importance of the children to our future is more than the children and the future. It is the present in which we live, whether or not you have children of your very own, because you know that others do or will some day.”
#12 — “So Ukraine is a country in Europe. It exists next to another country called Russia. Russia is a bigger country. Russia is a powerful country. Russia decided to invade a smaller country called Ukraine. So, basically, that’s wrong.”
#13 —“If you don’t put your heart and soul into improving the environment, whose heart and soul will you put into it?”
#14 — “You have to see and smell and feel the circumstances of people to really understand them.”
#15 — “What are the stakes in this election? They are everything if you vote. If you don’t vote, they’re nothing.”
#16 — “These immigrants come here from many nations because many nations have root causes that encourage immigrants to migrate. Should we blame Mexico or people who migrate through Mexico from nations like Guatemala and The Caribbean? No, because that’s a journey that root causes could make any of us make.”
#17 — “I was born realizing the flaws in the criminal justice system.”
#18 — “We invested an additional $12 billion into community banks because we know community banks are in the community and understand the needs and desires of that community as well as the talent and capacity of community.”
#19 — “What is the most important thing in government? It’s governing, even when people don’t particularly like being governed…and that’s why the people really are the government, if the trust is mutual between the government and the people who appreciate being governed by good governing people.”
#20 — “So when you think about it, there is great significance to the passage of time in terms of what we need to do to lay these wires, what we need to do to create these jobs. And there is such great significance to the passage of time when we think about a day in the life of our children and what that means to the future of our nation, depending on whether or not they have the resources they need to achieve their God-given talent.”
#1 Kamala
#2 K
#3 David
#4 D
#5 K
#6 D
#7 D
#8 K
#9 D
#10 K
#11 D
#12 K
#13 D
#14 K
#15 D
#16 D
#17 K
#18 K
#19 D
#20 K
Geez, David. It’s a toss-up. Well done. You sound just as dumb!!!! You tried this, right? She didn’t!
I could only tell them apart because I remembered a couple of Harris’ more memorable lines. I would say good job, but can you say that as a compliment when the goal is to sound as stupid as possible? Hmmm, tough question.
That said, we are at a cross roads and which road we take will determine the road we are on to our destination, which will be at the end of the road, unburdened by what has been before we took the road……..
Rick Bosshardt, MD
Well said, Dr. Bosshardt. And the real importance of crossroads is found in more than crossing those roads. It’s getting to the other side. Let us not chicken out, as the other side wants us to do, but get there, wherever there is. (Hysterical laughter.)
David excellent job, you could me Kamala La Mala’s speech writer. As a child born into a middle class family…… We were proud of our lawns…… Kackel Kackel…… silence the teleprompter is not working Kackel…….. The End
And yet, she might win. Sad.
Sometimes we have to fight but the fighting never ends so we cannot ever stop fighting. If we stop fighting we will lose the fight and we can never ever ever ever stop fighting or give up.
You probably have more fight in you than I have, Patricia. Congratulations!